Patience

There is a limit to my calm demeanor while waiting for something good to change my life. When I know something amazing, that is also life changing, is about to happen, I tend to go about my days in a whirlwind. I tend to speed up life. Wishing and wanting for that day to finally be upon me.

I am good for about a few months (tops!) of this crazy-inner-plea-to-be-patient.

When you ask me about the future, about my kids going to college, landing their careers, getting married, having babies of their own, I am patient. No doubt excited, but patient. I know it will happen when it is right, I will be prepared for that next chapter.

But I remember back to the days when I wanted to start our family. There were months of discussion and talk about when was the right timing. I was not patient. I wanted an instant family. Thankfully, God gave me that instant Yes for both pregnancies. There was no waiting. Dare I say, He knew I couldn't handle any waiting to announce a pregnancy?

So when I have friends, for whatever personal reason they have, long to start a family or grow their family, through pregnancy, or adoption, I want that instant family for them too. I know it is not my personal business, but I feel the energy of "Okay Already" from the first moment they divulge their dream. I admit I may not be a great friend during this time, as remember ... patience is not my strong suit. I want them to have that "instant fulfilment of dream" as much as if it were my own.

Imagine waiting for three years for the adoption of your child. Three. Years. As my friend stated so perfectly with tears last October, "You know how many of my friends and family are on round two of adding to their family - and I'm still waiting for my one addition?" The pain. The worry. The feeling like she had been forgotten by God was so real. I lost it right alongside her.

The road has not be the most easy, but the joy and reward have been. Imagine the phone ringing a few weeks later - at her breaking point and most vulnerable - to hear that God had a child waiting to join her family on the other side of the world. The call finally had come. She had never been forgotten.

Mid-day last Saturday, February 23rd, she flew home with her son to join her family of six, to make a perfect seven. The airport was crowded with family and friends who wanted to support this beautiful Homecoming.

If you have never been to an Adoption Airport Homecoming, I hope you do, some day in your lifetime. It is the most amazing, surreal, loving, hope bearing, joyful moment you could ever imagine. Different from a birth at a hospital, but at the same level of breath taking.

The pictures really capture the moment. The intensity of friends supporting family, the movement from making posters, to watching kids play, to Dad sitting in a chair in the middle of the large open atrium waiting. The Grandpa riding the escalator up to catch the view from the second floor, peering over the baggage claim carousels waiting for that first glimpse of his daughter and grandson. And then taking the escalator back down when it was still just too early. To then riding it back up. The siblings trying to hold their excitement in check - running here and there, with the Dad trying to keep them all together so every child gets that first moment, and doesn't miss it.

And then - the moment when Dad is summons to meet Mom and Son deep into baggage claim where they are alone, and then seeing the three of them appear to the crowd, hand-in-hand. No words. The crowd of family and friends fell silent. Strangers passing by, curious at this large crowd positioned in a massive huddle with camera's posed before them, fell silent too and just stopped. No words. The sounds of camera's clicking and soft "Ohhh" and sighs were the only sign that we were still there.

Three years.

Patience is necessary.

Patience drives families together.

Patience is a gift from God.

Welcome Home, Henry Z!! Lots of Love and Joy as you grow.

70th Birthday Celebration

My father-in-law turned 70 years young on Saturday. We knew as a family that he would want a big birthday party, so we did just that. After a few weeks of intense planning it was fun to see all the hard work that my husband, his sister and brother-in-law accomplished to make it a wonderful night.

We surprised the birthday boy with a portrait of his Grandkids. During the Christmas holiday season, my sister-in-law and I noticed that the last time the kids had their portraits taken together was when the youngest Grandchild was in preschool. It was a very cold, foggy, yet sunny day in January when we gathered at our local park for a photo shoot with the kids, but despite the cold it was very fun. The photos turned out great.

Saturday evening we held a very warm party in a banquet room of The Old Spaghetti Factory. It was nice to see family friends, and family come together to reminisce and enjoy each other's company. My brother-in-law worked hard at a slideshow presentation showing my father-in-law's life to music. It was very well done, and the music captured the different era's of his life. Bravo!

I remember the first time I met my future father-in-law. I had seen him here and there, but the first official meeting was shortly after my husband and I had been dating "long enough" to where you know it is time to meet the parents.

As we pulled up to his parent's driveway, my husband turned off the car and with a smirk shared that I didn't really have to laugh at his dad's jokes. He warned that if I laughed, it would just keep spurring him on to tell more. I thought that was funny ~ because honestly, what child thinks that their father is that funny.

We sat in their living room and talked. His mom was super sweet and full of smiles. His dad, told stories and jokes. I honestly thought he was funny. So I laughed, despite the looks that my hubby was giving me. I wasn't trying to brown-nose my way into the family, I really thought he was funny!!!

Decades later I am still laughing with my father-in-law. Although I might have heard some stories more than once, they are just as colorful and entertaining as when I heard them the first time.

As he told stories on Saturday at the after-party back at their house, it dawned on me how remarkable his memory is. And I don't mean that in an age-related way. But simply to know the amount of volume and variety that he has done in  his lifetime, and to remember the details like he does, is really admirable. And the details are not filled in later either, because when he retells the story, it is the same - the details don't change.

My father-in-law is a great story teller, with a sense of humor that is actually really funny, and he would do anything and everything to make any person in this world smile and laugh with him. He knows know stranger. I am thankful that he is my father-in-law.

Happy 70th Birthday, Ron!!! Wishing you a wonderful and blessed year! We love you!! xoxo

California in February

You can read about our first few days of adventure to California on my other blog: Paws for Independence. The purpose of our trip was to Turn-In Haddie to CCI for Advanced Training. We had overheard the locals say that the weather was unseasonably nice - it was the mid-70's during our entire trip, and started raining and snowing the day after we left California. Perfect timing!

The days following the Turn-In, we spent touring Napa Valley and San Francisco. Before leaving our house, I had not planned anything specific for that portion of our trip. I didn't mark any directions, any landmarks, nothing. I just knew how long it would take to get from our hotel to the city of Napa, and the city of San Francisco. It was realistic to stay in one place, so we made home at the Double Tree Hilton in Rohnert Park.

From there, we let Doris - our phone's navigation system that we named and use often - to guide us through our destinations. She didn't fail us. We had a wonderful day on Saturday touring Wine Country. It felt so great to enjoy the warmth of the sun. While I am not a wine connoisseur, I appreciate the smell of a vineyard, the landscape, and ambiance. It is a happy place, and I would love to live on a Vineyard in Napa. It would just be an amazing way to spend a life. It is so peaceful. I didn't want the sun to go down, I didn't want to leave.

Sunday brought us to San Francisco where we spent some time finding the hot spots of their City's Row Houses; Full House, Mrs. Doubtfire, and the High School shown on Princess Diaries. We tried for the Fire House in Princess Diaries where Amelia lived, but as we neared the highway headed to Oakland, we chickened out and dumped that idea. We added it to the list for "next time".

We were limited to one day in San Fran, so we had to be picky this time around. However, knowing this will be a yearly adventure (for as long as we Puppy Raise with CCI), we knew that we could spread out our sight seeing list. There is so much to see and do in San Fran, that it is nice that we have the opportunity to return regularly to get it all accomplished at a leisurely pace.

The row house and architecture were my favorite parts of San Francisco during this trip. The warm sunshine helped me fall in love with this city too.

Fisherman's Wharff, Crissy Park, and the Golden Gate Bridge rounded out our day (more photos for another post). We closed down the city and drove back to our hotel in Rohnert Park happy with our first adventure, and pleased to have an additional Bucket List of where to visit on our return.

18 Months of Perfect Days

"You can't have a perfect day without doing something for someone who will never be able to repay you." 

~ John Wooden

Thank you, Haddie and CCI, for our many perfect days.

Packing Day

We have had a wonderful lazy weekend. I am so happy it turned out that my mood fit the schedule of events; which was nothing. We are enjoying the last days with Haddie, but not making such a big deal to find all-things-spectacular to do with her. We have been on our outings, our last memories, but in a very casual and "life per usual" way. I am certain she would sense otherwise. She is one smart dog. We will have plenty of packed in spectacular adventure once we hit the road for our trip to California.

My parents spent last night with the Grandkids, taking them out for a night on the town Teen Style at a very hip Arcade, when the very hip bowling alley was booked, and mall walking (okay, so my son stayed with his grandparents and thoroughly enjoyed mingling through the cooking stores and the Tesla dealership versus mall walking with his sis and girl cousins), and cafe sipping.

While they were away my hubby and I enjoyed a quiet Mexican dinner-out and then home to watch the  fantastic movie, The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel, on demand television. I am a natural sucker for anything East Indian - movies and books especially. Loved this movie!

Today is all about Packing. My girl finished her homework, while my son volunteered to clean his room. Volunteered!! That means it was bad enough even for him. I was encouraging of his idea at the same time planted the seed that I would not help him pack until the room was clean.

My girl had everything ready. Clothes cleaned, ironed, hanging up and we picked from her selection outfits for the days we will be outta here. Her choices made good sense and she is done.

My son sat in her room while we were doing this, assuring me that his room was clean, and that he too was ready to pack. Over and over, he assured me. Well, he was half correct. While I did say that I wouldn't help until the room was clean, I forgot to add I wouldn't help until his clothes were clean too. I thought it went without mentioning that the number one factor in actually packing is having clothes to pack.

His room was clean. His closet, however, was full of dirty clothes heaped into a pile. Son, how are we supposed to start packing if all of your clothes are down there?! Sigh. We will be packing him later this evening once all the clothes are cleaned, ironed, and hanging up.

His humor and good charm make it so easy to remain calm and laugh with him. Thank goodness time is on our side too. That does help.

Packing Day may have just been extended, but I am so happy we have the lazy weekend plans to do it, with humor and good attitude too.

What's Up?!

I have so many thoughts and emotions taking up space that I am having a hard time concentrating on many things. I am making lists of lists to keep my brain as clutter-free as possible. I know flu and cold season is going around our area - I am one of the stats in the cold category - but I am trying my best to stay calm and not let worry consume me. I know that is counter-productive to staying healthy.

Eighteen months ago we started volunteering for Canine Companions for Independence, and I started a new blog called, Paws for Independence. I have tried very hard to keep our family's volunteer work separate from my Elle J Thoughts blog. Partly because I knew the task of Puppy Raising a Service Dog was going to be a whole lot of work and take much of my attention, that I didn't want to turn my family life blog ... right here on Elle J Thoughts ... into all things-puppy.

Considering that my husband warned me that keeping two blogs was going to be a juggling act, I think I have done well given the circumstances of my daily calendar. I am positive he would agree with me, and at the same time I completely agree with his warning - it has been a hard juggling act.

We are nearing our completion of Puppy Raising Haddie. Next week we will begin our journey to California to return her to CCI so she can begin Advanced Training. If she is deemed worthy of staying in training, then she will graduate at the earliest in August of this year. If she is chosen for a different program other than a Service Dog (Hearing Dog, Diabetic Dog), it could be later in the year.

Because there are no guarantees in life, even for the four legged, she could receive an early dismissal and have her Change of Career papers anytime prior to August. That would mean that she would come back to our city and live with a very special family, our friends, as a very beloved and spoiled pet.

Of course we do not know what the future holds for Haddie, but we know that she will be perfectly placed in her forever family no matter if she is a Graduate of CCI, or a Change of Career puppy. That is what keeps us moving forward, knowing that she will have the best adventures in life coming her way. And that her lovable, sparkling personality will change someone's life for the better; Service Dog or Pet, she is just that amazing to do her job of "change for the better".

So in these next seven days as we prepare our hearts, our minds, and wrap our thoughts around the fact that We Really Did This!!! and our puppy raising days are coming to conclusion, I can honestly say that this has been the single best challenge and team building exercise our family has ventured into. I am honored to be a Puppy Raiser for CCI, and most grateful to my family who have stuck together, pitched in, and made it work with lots of dedication, interest, and love (not only towards Haddie) but towards each other.

What's Up?! A whole lot of emotions, and thoughts, and ... well ... pride.

Something Bigger

This morning my daughter and I had the honor of attending an Adoption Shower for our very dear friend who is anxiously waiting for an Embassy call that says they can travel back to Ethiopia to bring home their son. While they have met, and have passed court, they need paperwork from the U.S. Embassy to bring him home.

The wait is long. Not necessarily in time, considering, but long for the heart and mind. I am certain the days are longer than 24 hours for our friend and her family. It has to be. They have touched their son, hugged him, kissed him, tickled him, laughed with him, watched him dance, chase a balloon, talk in his native language, and they have cried together ... and now they are separated by an ocean once again, just waiting.

Today her family and friends gathered together to celebrate the adoption of this precious boy. He has a family, and so many friends waiting to welcome him home and surround him and his family in love, prayer, and friendship. We all can not wait for his homecoming.

My sweet friend requested that she not receive gifts for her son. This being her fifth child, she felt she had everything they needed for him. Instead, she requested that if we felt called to bring something to the shower, that we would bring a donation for the orphanage where her son has been staying. She wanted to bless the orphanage on her return visit, and her goodbye visit, with an over abundance of supplies.

The ladies in her life did just that today. The large dinning room table was filled to capacity in addition to tubs filled under the table of our love to these sweet children on the other side of the world. From coloring crayons, to paper, to bubbles, kazoos, plastic animals, Nerf footballs, clothing, blankets, dental floss, ohhh, the table was f.u.l.l. of so much creativity in supplies. It was so much fun to see the pile continue to grow as more woman passed in and out of the Open House style of shower.

And then, the highlight, was the most powerful prayer from the Hostess to bless our sweet friend on her continued journey and chapter in bringing home her son. Tears flowed. I am not sure how the Hostess continued with out cracking her voice ... or just stopping. She was solid - powerful. Loved it.

The rest of the day, my girl and I have been on a happy-friendship-high as we were filled-up today with hope, joy, happiness, peace. It feels awesome on this very foggy, wet, and cold day ~ to have that inner sunshine that beams knowing that you are aware of this "something bigger" adventure.

S.P. - your heart is so huge, your compassion so real, your truthfulness in sharing, and creating a voice for the parent-less is so inspiring. I am very grateful to know you, and to walk beside you. I am looking forward to that first moment when we see your sweet son enjoying the BDB Peach together!! (wink).